correy_fallo137

i forget why i bother
then i remember
that i'm bothered
so i continue on

oh oh oh oh
my legs are weary
they've walkin' aimlessly around
the cracks in the street are the same
and everything in this town is to blame
i feel like i should fly away
but you have to learn how to fly
and im scared of being high above
because im so used to being down below
my life is subterranean
i could use a little less sunshine
and a little more night time
thats usually the better time
but its all to no use anyway
all these things i say
they are really only for me anyway

-----------------
an embryo floats through space
between the galaxies
thriving off the meaningless gravity
so free to fly, why come down
there is a finite feeling
to being stuck on the ground

-----------------
i've been stranded
in this civil war town
every corner branded with violence
these rotten streets of ambivalence

vapid vapor emotions
fog the frenzied houses
luring the injured spirits
in and out of death

back and forth march the massacred feet
no beat, just the endless refrain
so stained, with the desperate toil
all to spoil, they marched in vain

in and out
back and forth
marched the massacred feet
violently colliding
with every war torn body
destroying the last of the city again
such a deadly refrain,
marched the massacred feet
on the rotten streets of ambivalence

im the happiest depressed person i know

i have a fever
i've felt bad all day
and i might have to go to the hospital tomorrow
life is awesome, i suppose.
if swine flu wasn't an option
then i wouldn't even care
and i would just wait it out
im so pissed.

i think i might try things out again
i just hope i can stop fantasizing and start living

"burnt-out ends of smokey days"

i feel the stars burn
like cigarettes in your hands
a breath of smoke
walks along the street
as i feel the world revolve
around this sidewalk.
twilighted street lamps
illuminate a breath of smoke
that glides down the street
as the world revolves

dance
like the world
revolving
and
revolving
swirling out
like burnt cigarette ends
nothing but a whisp
revolving

i whisp and breathe
this cigarette end
it reflects my eyes
and burns them blue

pandora is reallly cool thing you know.
i love hearing new music.
and hearing songs from familiar artists
that aren't singles.
tis nice

i have a lot of things on my mind.

i think ill start blogging here again

because it gives me one more thing to do.
and sometimes i need one more thing to do.

im goin bowling tonight
im extremely competitive
so i always get pissed
because my friends are good
and i dont like losing
or shooting gutter balls
im a little baby sometimes
but most of the time
my pissyness is in jest
but still.

"when imma a walkin i strut my stuff,and im so strung out"

i miss this place

i think i might need live journal again.
because i have to have a place to go
where i can actually say what i feel
mainly a place because
i dont people to think somethings wrong with me
when i have to vent
which is where im at right now
if i still have any friends on here
you dont have to read this

college has been an adventure.
a grand one at that
in many ways
so many things have changed
i drank alcohol for the first time
got drunk for the first time
smoked weed for the first time
did both at the same time for the first time
i even smoked cigarettes for the first time
last night. which is something i never intended on doing
even though i smoke pot.

i feel like im falling apart
i feel like the person i was, is crumbling around me
change is not bad
but i cant help but notice whats changing
are these changes for the better?
i am both happy and sad.
so i cant really tell.

other things have changed other than my substance abuses
i think in a way im more social.
i have way more friends than i intended
because i honestly thought that wouldn't have barely any at this point
but i have plenty
most of which i hang out with all the time.

i feel like more of an adult in some ways
independence i suppose
but i also suppose ive used that independence to make stupid decisions
or maybe those decisions arent really that stupid
maybe i should be allowed to stupid for once.
i dont know

mainly i dont care
caring has gotten me no where
i just feel like i have to experience life
i dont want to miss out on these things

its not this is middle school you know
i can be responsible with irresponsibilty
you know

im coming apart at the seams

i feel like a bad person

but in a way
im tired of innocence.
i cant stand it.

i used to be the person to tell people that they shouldnt do bad things
and now im the bad things doer.
which is the H word
but its not really
ive just changed

i wish you could understand the true irony
of this "change"

i want to go home so bad
extremely bad.
im constantly stressed about school
and about my decisions
and about my loneliness
and so many other things.

i ask myself the same questions everyday and never get the answer

i just dont fuckin know

i want a girl to hold and kiss
a sweet girl
who gets me
thats all

im so lonely right now
fuck

i don't care for livejournal
anymore
at the moment anyway.
that doesn't matter much though.

my friends kept me up till six in the morning.
and i can't help but be a little pissy.

i'm reading identical
by ellen hopkins

there is a new modest mouse cd comin out.

college band camp is enternally looming

"so that is that and this is this you tell me what you want i'll tell you what you get"

i slept for almost twelve hours.
the world is a vampire
sucking the life out of my neck
i'll get a blood transplant and move on
i suppose.

i want to see that movie
it's about jack white, jimmy page, and the edge.
i really like and respect all three
especially ole jack

the air is thick with the winds of change
time to blow back the leaves covering the sidewalk
and start the journey

i really like some people on live journal
some i dont but thats okay.

ill be seeing green day soon

the drum corp show was awesome
the blue devils one
no surprise i suppose
i thought phatom should of placed higher
but i suppose in retrospect they weren't the best
i was really surprised by the boston crusaders
they had the best show design i thought.

i don
t
ha
ve
anyth
ing
else to
talk ab
out

drum corp show today

"here i am laid bare at the end of my rope"

i'm freezing.

church was very inspiring today.
the youth gave testimony for like an hour before the pastor even spoke.
its not my church though. still

my friends are playing halo
and im kinda secluding myself.
mainly cause i dont wanna play.

i read the bible, mainly to pass the time.
but i always feel better afterwards.

it's hard for me to watch people be in love
it was hard to watch harry and ginny
in the movie
and that's embarrassing to say.
but it's true.
i want nothing more than to be in a movelike relationship
because the relationships i've had have been just too weird

i have a headache
it's one of them fever im sick kinda headaches
but it's not that bad.

yesterday was suicidal(emotionally not literally)
enlightening and hopeful, mostly happy
thats just how i am.

im going to a drum corp competition wednesday
itll be my first time.

ive been up since 8 and it's now 1
and
"my head is pounding i can't stop the pounding i think that its going to explode"

i hopeful that the adventures i crave are in my near future

i feel very hateful towards my ex
but i wont explain

i hate some of you guyses entries
and i dont read them anymore
but i won't tell you who you are
:P
but if you comment or read this
i doubt your one.

"im going through changes"
thats got to be the best black sabbath song ever

i learned a little about mormonism today
-----------------------------

FILL OUT PLEEEZ


INFO
1. Name:
2. Birthday:
3. Where do you live:
4. IM:
5. What are you studying/What are you working as:
6. What makes you happy:
7. What are you listening to now/have listened to last:
8. Weirdest food you like:
9. An interesting fact about you:
10. Are you in love/have a crush at the moment:
11. Favorite place to be:
12. Favorite lyric:
13. Best time of the year:
14. Put a picture of yourself:

RECOMMEND
1. A film:
2. A book:
3. A song:
4. A band:

PLUS
1. One thing you like about me:
2. Two things you like about yourself:
3. Put this in your lj so I can tell you what I think of you?

PLUS PLUS
-favorite video game
-favorite smell
-are you a virgin
-have you smoked pot
-whats your religion
-if you had to chose exactly one, loner, geek, emo,  prep, jock which one
-are you a hipster
-do you only listen to not popular music/do you only listen to popular music
-can you play any instruments
-have you ever written a song
-whats a big fear (i dont mean something like im afraid of spiders, something deep)
-least favorite band
-do you like learning
-do you like reading
-how smart do you consider yourself
-sexual orientation
-are you happy with your life